How to Know If Someone Is Worth Dating: A Guide for Men

There are no rules on how to know if someone is worth dating. However, you can learn a thing or two from our notes.

You can practically date anyone in this day and age, providing they’re on an online dating app or platform.

It may not be a guarantee that you’ll end up in a quality relationship, but you certainly have access to choices. Unfortunately, the more people you date, the more people you meet who aren’t worth your time.

Since love is at our fingertips nowadays, finding who to date isn’t a problem.

Meeting a person is one thing. Getting to know them is another story. Unfortunately, there’s no instruction manual teaching daters how to know if someone is worth dating. The signs aren’t always obvious. What if the object of your affection turns out to be a total jerk all along?

We’re aware that red flags are an often-discussed subject (and with good reason). For this blog, we’ll help you learn how to tell if the person you’re seeing is a keeper.

How to Know If You Want to Date Someone

Before you look for love, here’s one question you should answer: are you even ready for it?

The truth is, readiness levels are hard to tell. Sometimes, the “I’m just not ready” card can be vague because some of us can’t explain why we’re not game for relationships. As The Atlantic senior editor Julie Beck writes, “ ‘readiness’ is a well-worn T-shirt people put on and take off over and over again throughout their dating life, an all-purpose explanation for any number of reasons someone might or might not want a romantic partner.”

Still, being ready for one makes a difference. It’s not a one-size-fits-all approach, but here are some general signs that say your heart is open for business:

The mourning is over

If you’ve just broken up, you may be reeling from the effects and hurt. As time passes, this pain goes away. But sometimes, those feelings linger and the moment you think you’re ready to hop on the dating bandwagon, you find yourself off again because, face it, you’re still mourning. You’re well within your right to grieve, so go ahead and mourn it. Take as much time as you need. Just make sure you’re using healthy coping mechanisms.

When you’ve fully healed, it’s on you to say that you’re open to love again. If you can reminisce without bitterness, take that as a good sign.

Excitement kicks in

One of the top indicators of readiness is your attraction toward another person. Observing how you feel about someone is one way how to know if someone is worth dating.

You know you're ready to date someone if the thought of them excites you!

Is there a specific someone that can’t seem to escape your thoughts? Don’t feel guilty for catching feelings! That’s a good sign that makes room for someone new in your life. Who knows — that person may stick around longer and be greater than expected.

You want someone — not need them

This sign may seem contradictory, but hear us out: you know you’re ready when you recognize you don’t need them. There’s a difference between that and wanting a person.

Sometimes, we (intentionally or unconsciously) rely on others for fulfillment. This behavior is not only impractical but toxic as well. It’s unfair to put that burden on someone else, and it won’t do your psyche any good — especially if they disappoint you.

A partner shouldn’t be the sole thing your life revolves around. Once you realize this, you’ll gain the space for someone new to enter the picture.

How to Know If You Should Date Someone

At this juncture, you’ve (ideally) figured out that you’re ready for love. Now that that part’s settled, let’s move to the next point. How do you know if your object of affection is worth a space in your life?

Let these cues point you in the right direction:

Watch their attitude

A person’s attitude is just as telling as their words. Do they have great manners? Are they calm and collected in tense situations? Do they know how to hold themselves accountable, especially when they’ve made mistakes? If these three things (and more) apply, you may have found a keeper!

Look at how they treat you

Gentlemanly behavior isn’t a trend. Rather, it’s a timeless practice that’ll never go out of style. Your match doesn’t have to be like a character straight out of a storybook, but you should expect respect from them. Decent behavior isn’t a tall order, right?

You can tell if a match is worth dating by seeing how they treat you.

Flirty messages are cute, but when they follow through with something they’ve told you, that person is the real deal. What good is someone’s words if they don’t have the actions to back them up?

See what drew them to you

Before looking for tips on how to date successfully, you may want to figure out why your match is into you in the first place. How did you enter their orbit?

Are they only interested because of your looks? Is it something about your personality that roped you into their radar? If physical attractiveness is the only factor, your match may unfortunately only appreciate surface-level qualities.

Observe how they are around your loved ones

Unless they live under a rock, your match has interacted with other people in their life. As you get to know each other, you’ll interact with each other’s circles. Is your match displaying decent behavior around your loved ones, or do they disregard and resent their presence in your life?

Don’t ignore how your match treats others. Their treatment of people outside your relationship is just as revealing as their attitude toward you.

There’s little to no hesitance in defining your status

It’s 2023, and it’s about time we throw mind games away for good. Trust us when we say nobody has time for them! Playing with someone’s feelings is never a good move, so why beat around the bush with your relationship status?

People tend to walk on eggshells when defining a relationship because it generates anxiety, nervousness, and confusion. If your match wants more than just a short-term arrangement and asks you if you want the same thing, you may be onto something good!