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What Are You Looking for in a Relationship?: 3 Key Factors
What are you looking for in a relationship? Answer this before entering into a commitment.
One mistake that singles often make when dating is going into it blindly.
What does this mean?
You swipe left and right, exchange messages with your matches throughout the day, and go on dates now and then. But here’s a question to ponder on: What are you looking for in a relationship?
Perhaps you don't know what to say. If so, think of it as going to your dream destination without a map. While thrilling, the question is whether you'll successfully arrive. Chances are, you’ll get lost or go in circles.
If you’re serious about finding the love of your life, you need to find the answer to this question before even signing up on a dating site or saying yes to a date.
But how do you determine what you want in a relationship?
Here are three factors you should consider.
1. Relationship Goals
“What are you looking for in a relationship?”
If you want to know the answer to this question, you should also ask yourself what kind of relationship you want.
Are you only interested in something casual? Or do you want something serious and long-term? Are you keen on getting married soon, or do you want to take things slow?
Reflect on where you want to be with your future partner and set goals for yourself. This is important because not everyone wants the same thing in a relationship.
According to key findings about online dating in the U.S., 44% of online daters seek to find a long-term partner, while 40% are looking for casual dates.
When you know what kind of relationship you want, you can narrow your choices and find the right date more easily.
2. Qualities of Your Partner
Once you know which direction you want to go, reflect on the kind of person you want to date.
Do physical traits matter to you or not? If yes, what attributes do you seek, and why?
But more than that, reflect on the inner characteristics that you want in a partner. Think of the qualities that make you feel loved and secure in a relationship.
If you have had failed relationships, remember what went wrong and what you need from a partner to make things work.
A few of the most important qualities to search for are maturity, sincerity, fidelity, respectfulness, and honesty.
3. Value Systems
Values are principles that affect your perspective of life, your decisions, and your motivations.
Your cultural and religious values, family ties, perception of marriage, and way of raising children determine whether you and your partner will get along well.
If you don’t share the same values, you might often clash, creating division in the relationship. But if your values coincide, life together will be easier and more fulfilling.
Your Answer Helps You Find the Right Partner
So, what are you looking for in a relationship?
Reflect on these three key factors to make your dating journey more effective and meaningful.
However, remember that these don’t serve as a box to place potential partners. They’re only a guide to help you determine who is compatible with you and if a relationship is worth pursuing with them.
You’re not looking for a perfect person, but the right partner to share your life with.
Reference
Vogels, Emily A., and Colleen McClain. 2023. “Key findings about online dating in the U.S.” Pew Research Center.
